It’s like watching a train wreck in slow motion. It’s happened to all of us. That moment when you say or do something, and you can’t believe you’ve just done that. Said the wrong thing, made a bad decision or created the opposite result from what you wanted. Sabotage can also be very subtle. It’s the times when you watch a bit too much television, take too long to get ready or don’t do enough preparation for something important. No matter which way it is dressed up sabotage has a way of making a stamp on our lives that makes us feel that we are not good enough, that we don’t belong or that feeling of being unloved. It sucks. And yet somehow, we repeat the pattern even though we promised ourselves we wouldn’t do that thing again. Sometimes we are the only ones that know we’ve just self-sabotaged ourselves and the outside world is oblivious to our internal pain.
These circumstances, events and situations still replay in my mind at times. Something could have happened more than 20 years ago and yet my trusty sub-conscious that has the key to everything in the vault of my brain can bring these events to the surface to remind me of my flaws. I now know how destructive this is and still it happens. This is where I make the choice. I can now choose to be in a state of self-pity, and we all need a pity party at times, or I interrupt my thoughts.
I’ve learned over the years that interrupting the flow of my thoughts is the answer. This is where I can kiss the self-sabotage goodbye because now I know better. This has been a process and over the years I’ve gotten quicker and quicker at spotting these times of spiralling down. What happens to me is a thought from the past pops up into my mind and then I start to feel miserable and feel so disappointed with myself that I didn’t handle the situation back then in a better way. I know I can’t go back and change anything but I would still replay that scene over and over and feel even more miserable. It used to be a place of spiralling now.
Now, when I catch myself going back to the past and replay a scene that makes me feel bad I catch myself early and interrupt the thought. I ask myself “Is this the future I want to create?”. I know that the thoughts that I am thinking right now will set forward and energy and motion that impact my future. Have you ever been in a situation where you are in a room and someone walks into the room and the energy just shifts? I always say, your energy arrives before you do. I want the energy of me that arrives before I do to be uplifting and support me and others. That means I need to shift my energy.
The three methods I’ve found to work the fastest and best are:
1. Stand up and shake it off. I move my body by taking a walk, running on the spot, jumping up and down or shaking my hands. I can feel the energy shift in my body right away.
2. Look for something beautiful to appreciate. Who doesn’t love a puppy, a kitten a growing plant, a gorgeous sunrise, clouds floating on by in the sky or leaves rustling in a breeze. There is always something to appreciate in nature. You can appreciate it by looking at it, going outside and immersing yourself in it and touching foliage or putting your bare feet on the natural ground. You can even sit quietly and take yourself to any beautiful spot in the space of your mind.
3. Take a deep breath. The act of taking a deep breath is an almost instantaneous shift because to take a deep breath you need to do that consciously and that means you need to take your focus away from that thought you are having and bring your attention to your body. Bringing your attention to your body can have a huge benefit to bring you back into the now. Take a deep breath by breathing into your belly. On the inhale expand your belly and on the exhale let your belly come all the way towards your spine and be sure to sit upright.
I do whatever it takes to shift me from going down that spiral.
All of these methods work because they bring your mind back from that past into the present moment. In the present moment we rarely have problems. It’s only when we look to our past or uncertainty in our future do we bring up feels that we don’t enjoy. Use these simple strategies any time you need to shift your attention back to the now.
You can kiss self-sabotage goodbye by shifting your energy in each and every moment where you find yourself heading down the wrong path, the path you did not intend. I wonder what method you will use to interrupt your thoughts and shift your energy in the moment. Before you know it, you will get good at it and life will feel lighter and happier.
Make a comment or contact me and let me know which method works best for you. You may have another method that I haven’t mentioned.