That which we resist persists. What we put push away amplifies because we give it our attention and energy. It’s much easier to talk and think about what we don’t want than to describe our desires and the life we want. Try it now and see how it feels to imagine a life with everything you want. It’s likely going to be a bumpy ride. If we are completely honest with ourselves, we will discover that we push against things because we are too scared or worried that things won’t work out? We resist in some strange way to protect ourselves from disappointment and instead bring that disappointment forwards feeling defeated now instead of directing our energy to what we desire. What you are resisting?
I was pushing away what I most wanted by focusing on what wouldn’t work out. A constant internal battle between what I wanted and what I feared. It was exhausting me, and I was getting nowhere. I was digging a hole where I couldn’t see a way out. We don’t need to know why we do something because that can lead us down a rabbit-hole of focusing on everything we don’t like and experiences we’d rather not remember. What we do need to do is resolve the feelings from the past and shift our focus. I got a coach to help me find my way out.
Coaching brought me back to my principles of Nurture, Grow, Flourish which reminded me to nurture myself. No wonder I was spiraling down. I believe we need to nurture all aspects of ourselves mind, body and spirit in order to have the capacity for growth and I wasn’t doing what I believed in the most. I was able to look at what I was doing and then make a decision to do things that nurtured me. That for me was stopping working at a reasonable time, taking time to prepare beautiful colorful and nourishing food, listening to my morning and evening mediations and watching some funny movies. It wasn’t until I watched a really nice movie that I realized I haven’t smiled for a while. No wonder I wasn’t flourishing.
Feelings are our clue and the key. When we start to feel good, we create the capacity to change our circumstances. Life is about feeling good no matter what is going on just for the sake of feeling good. Sometimes we put too much pressure on ourselves to live an exceptional life instead of just being. I regularly remind myself that my Soul can’t taste chocolate so living this life is good and that is enough for now. Taking care of myself, nurturing all parts of me, was setting me on a path of feeling happy. I’m not going to beat myself up for not being perfect and instead I start fresh each day making peace with what is. Now instead of resisting I look for something to feel good about first and then take the action.